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doctor kenshin's clinicFebruary 07 the BESTPhelps was now finding himself swimming in the boiled pool after Sunday posted a photo that showed marijuana at an university party. The Olympic hero bumps a daunting problem now. All the media focused on this issue. Critics and newspaper now can find an excuse to enjoy a busy weekend. There are rumors said he may face criminal charges. Even though phelps has expressed regret for this affairs and promise to be mature, he is now falling into ethic condemn. All this story bring me back to the affairs of kobe in 2003. At that time,kobe was in accuse of raping and experinced his up-and-down in his career. Today, kobe boast his glory of 81 scores and MVP. His achievements are immortal and even surpass michel Jordan. But a closer insight of the two person,by a deeper sense,and particularly changing our fossil consiousness. Our sympathy and understanding for The BEST may grow gradually. Above all, phelps is a individual,a man. And invariablely, he is a man who has such a self-dicipline to dedicate himself in trial 11hours under water. As a athlete, in order to keep a good condition,he has to insist to on one digest,one schedual,and one confined life surround. He can’t indulge in the bar the whole night like his fellow. He can’t meet a girl and have sex. So can we blame a people ,who scarificed so many interest of human life to creat a wonder in human sports, if we realize we are wandering around and dissipation everyday. For kobe in 2003,he really had one night with that girl. But in USA, Clinton can have an affair. He had issued public apology,acknowledging ”I’m sorry. i made a mistake.”I understand his love to his wife through is sincere tear. However ,no one understand his ambition. No one understand the pressure and prejudice he faced if he aimed at THE BEST. Shark once said:”be light guy, why you are always so serious. ok,you wanna be great and you wanna be step on us. So people will alienate you. ” Even that time shark was more popular and accessible, but dull will know he was not a virgin. Whatever, kobe persist on his unbelievablely hard trainning for years,that is 6hours a day,6days a week. That’s what we distinguish shark and kobe. One is great and another is immortal. Perhaps,it is seems a chronic pain for all the BEST, it is so difficult to strike a balance for extreme self-discipline and extreme self-indulgent. And this is a question once I raised for spencer,but he can’t answer. 短文若干当孤独成为一种习惯。 当孤独成为一种习惯。 习惯于周六的晚上同一家超市。 习惯同一种奶咔。 习惯穿梭于地铁站的嘈杂。 习惯每天下午在图书馆趴一下。 习惯十一点钟下班,穿过城市的心脏 那天,忙完了导师的工作,出了医院,顿时傻眼了,人行道上挤满了人,所有的道路都堵死。今天是什么日子啊? “十、九、八….”原来是新年倒计时。 我想此地,是这个星球上最热闹的地方,气泡,彩带,人们的欢笑声。周围的情侣相拥而吻。 我看着别人的老婆,盘算着怎么才能回家睡觉,这时一条故友的短信:“在哪,还好吗?” “我在人群之外…”这时我才明白,人类才是他妈的地球上最孤独的动物。
湖与琴 去西湖的时候,是阴天,人家都说她像林妹妹的愁容 . 湖很静,心也很静。 我一直相信只有平静才能积淀。 然而这种坚持有些固执。 你笑我琴弦绷得太紧,不仅音色不好,还会断弦。 我又没有大海的博大,既容得下波涛,又显得出寂静。 湖水不可能总是平静,或许湖水融入大海是一个成长的过程。 现实中有太多的隐忍,我想的太多,其实我是故作安宁 你管我,你又不是我等待的那朵涟漪。
Dior 年轻的时候不懂,外形过于张扬让人觉得不踏实,其实应该走低调路线。 “世间关于美的标准,总是一贯乏味.清凉眼眸,甘甜唇齿.一双骨结清晰的手,手背上宛转延伸的蓝色静脉如同山峦起伏.这样的男子,脸上会混合女人与孩子的轮廓特征. 你不会希望与他谈一场恋爱.因为会畏惧试图穿越那具光华的皮囊,触摸到一颗庸碌的心.” 是吧,所以你觉得我没有安全感。 如果室友带回的女人在大声嚷嚷,所有人都会认为她是我带回来的。如果死胖gay从我的房间出来,所有人也认为是我带回来的。 外形张扬给人印象浮躁,而我每天背负的生死之重却无人能懂。 我目睹着一颗颗心脏在慢慢停止,却无能为力。我穿梭于动天的悲悯中却强装宽颜。 尴尬在于你是不懂的 尴尬在于我不懂暧昧,你也不懂。 尴尬在于我的把自己藏在政治的牢笼,而你藏在你手心。 尴尬在于几年来我沉迷于一种你罥烟眉梢的画印,而此刻我已分不清感情。 尴尬在于外人以为我像小提琴一般的轻佻,连你也读不出大提琴的深沉与纠结。
我也不知道怎么去像常人一般寻找一份暧昧的解脱。 算了,这种挣扎已经成为习惯-------广告:dior.
烟友 我不会抽男人递过来的烟。除非政治应酬。 我不会抽烟,大多在嘴里打打转转,无法像他们一般沁入咽喉,渗入魂魄。 我包里只有女烟。是她忘下的。 作为医生我可以提出善意的忠告,到时候还是同流合污。 烟友走了快几个月了。唯一能催生回忆的只有气味,其它女人的烟味和香水味,鬼知道什么牌子的,脑子里有回想起她点烟的侧脸。 她是怎样一个如此神奇而鲜明的女人呢。 如果我闭上眼睛,可以回忆起在新天地的舞池里,烟雾缭绕,她五官很精致,下巴和鼻子尖尖的。发尖随着节奏舞动。临晨三点钟也可以把我叫到外滩抽烟,我依然陶醉于江岸的建筑,那时候没有吵嚷的人群。 她还有很好玩的朋友,性感的女伴在babyface里的美妙舞姿,而我色迷迷的看着这位性感女神的纤腰,职业性的琢磨着切开看看。当然还有她我实在“看不懂”的独门舞步,为此评价她气得差点拆了我。她还会仗义的介入她姐妹的跨国婚姻纠纷,汗颜的啄女本色。当然,她也和我参加了反同灭gay活动,“你不要再缠着我的男朋友了”哈哈,gay弟弟无语了。 之后她飞回南半球了, 走的时候,在我的白大褂上留下了“I am a man whore ”...我的生活又一如既往的平静。 “你不要再强调我们是两个世界的人。”我的世界?忙碌和不知所谓,一片血肉模糊,灵魂都暗淡了。有时候想起这段经历我还是会发笑。 当时有个教授问我万宝路是什么意思,我虽然知道正确的答案,却告诉了他一个实际的真谛:“有一种微醺,你明知道她不健康,刺激,呛鼻,香味浓重,却对之有一种无法抗拒的迷醉”。
姐弟恋 印象里有姐姐帮我缝扣子的画面,朦胧着,是年少封存的情愫。 之所以如此,会喜欢个子高的女人。 比你大的女人,总会当你是个boy。 她们毫无警惕的和你倾诉着,安慰你,平抚你幼稚的烦恼。 她或许是曾是家里的大小姐,但在这个城市,她要独自生存。 她如此消瘦,一袭白衣,跟在灭绝师太的后面。新来的人总是要干到最后,她太累了,她一个人忙里忙外,独当一面,掌控一间房的麻醉。 我们太累了,快凌晨了,手术室剩下我们。 “逢皮王子,弄好了,收工吧。” 我俩送病人回病房,空荡荡的医院,空荡荡的心。 “你知道吗,有一次我累得睡在电梯里了。” “恩,女人这么卖命会老得很快。” “所以我得赶快把自己嫁出去” “对象呢” “现在谈恋爱,都不会相信真心的付出了”,“我很老实的”,“往往说老实的最不老实”你们对视着,目光又游离。心理有一种暗示,这是不可能的。 你只能静静的看着她,你想知道她曾经历怎样的阅历,又是哪个男人伤了她的心。 或许男人生命中总有几个这般的红颜。
夫妻相 --------纪念老麻雀的第一段故事 年岁增长,逐渐发现缘分是一件不可亵渎的事情。 年轻气盛的时候,总是追求自己可望不可及的东西。 是什么让我们相遇,相识,相知,误会,错过。 什么让我求而不得。 人们把自己无力而又混沌的事情归结为缘分。 在医院可以发现一件很有趣的事情。 很多夫妻有着极为相似的五官特征。 他们在落难的时候不弃不舍,相互扶持,好似天注定的缘分。 所以冥冥之中,我们的择偶癖好是不是也有如此的巧合。 很久以来,我的宿命总是在同时安排两个女人,一个有气质古典,行走如弱柳扶风。另一个或许乖巧舒服,秀外慧中。 古往今来,如同红楼里的情结,我同样固执的追求的前者 ,而每次在雨天的失落后,等来的却是后者的慰籍。而我对于后者总是不去珍惜,固执于求而不得的东西。 今天看到她,朋友惊诧,这女的怎么和你长得这么像。她和我的故事可以追溯到六年之前,原本豆蔻梢头二月初的她,如今落落大方。我说,你长大了。想起年少的傻事,也会会心一笑,后来她消失了。或许命运让我们认识得太早。原来和我这么相似的女人我曾经不知珍惜,但倘若我珍惜了,我们又能怎样,成长的道路上会不会分道扬镳。 经历了这么多,却发现一切回到原点,是一种黯伤。
-------------------我有了她的电话,但是回长沙的日子竟忘了约她,而且或许我是再也会不去的了。我都忘了怎么谈恋爱了,也懒得谈恋爱,我想说,你瞧咱俩这么有夫妻相就结婚吧。每天下班,我孤独的穿过来福士的人流。每天和这么多人擦肩而过,是不是真的有一个和你有夫妻相的人在这人群里?或许仅仅是错过。 November 29 国境以南 太阳以西when you watch the soap opera, the figure of a docoter is always cool,knowledgable,sentimental and hansdsome that every lady hopes to marry.however in the reality, things are gonna be fragile with realistic evaluation.there is no preferencial weighting on family.the preponderance of girlfriend at dating dinner seems to be disappear for a emergent call from the hospital.working in the top 5 hospital in shanghai doesn't promisea prosperous life.competition is everywhere,pressure is everywhere.my life is ..i can't find a proper word to describe.i don't need to care about the sustenance.missing a lunch is everyday routine ,suturing at night in the hospital for a drunk,writing discharge procedure for patient who is hard to deal with.when i tired out in the elevator,i bumped the girl ilike.but i even can't have energy to chat with her,let alone the flirting.i nearly forget the face of her. i always can't find a feeling of peace in the inmost.a excllent doctor,or you hope to be the one like that,has no resting place,no crowd of freinds circle for amusement,no judgment from outside to his work which can replase the self-fulfilment. i met a girl,her life are totally different from me.her circle is queer.and i met a lot of her gf,their life are getting hand in the reality.i find long before i have confined in the imaginary circle and i have such an ideal that it can't stand up for the test of reality.she is like lv zi in the famous novel <<Norwegian wood>>.she has a strange sun glasses,fassional sense,eccentric behaviour,Marlboro and for the most importpart---sincerety
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